Hank, our pet Spider, is doing great...creepy, but great.He has a bug now.Mom saw a small flying bug in Hank's Web.I am not telling how it got there, or if it had help getting there,or if it was placed there,or whatever. It is there.Hank jumped on it in a flash! He took it away deep into his Web, dodging the water droplets Mom placed on his Web in case he was thirsty.Hank was gone all night.This morning, Hank was back, front and center, his bug all wrapped up,with Hank guarding it from above.When Mom got her dinner out of the Microwave, Hank zipped off,behind Knick- Knack- Snowman's green and white striped stockings.He might never get used to the slamming of the Microwave door. We might never get used to him, so its even- Steven. Snowman knick- knack wishes Hank would not call his leg Home.There is a repulsive fascination to get to watch a Spider and its daily doings.You must have lots of extra time to even care.Check.You must resist the urge to smash or eat the Spider. Check. You must like filth and cobwebs. Check! Spiders can live 10 years or more.Spiders can live without food for 6 months. Hank has food and water,so he should live a long long time.Maybe, over the years, I will have My picture taken next to Hank, next to the Microwave.Year after year after year. Hank can be on our Christmas cards,all the Family...2 legged, 4 legged, 8 legged.What if Hank has babies? Will they swarm all over the kitchen, tiny moving dots, infiltrating ever nook and cranny of our house? Even the 20 foot high peak?!Awesome! There will be a Spider/ Crazy Cat Lady Documentary on PBS. There will be Hank T-shirts and Hank Totes and Hank Coffee Mugs... much like my extremely poor selling Pooter Pal items...or equally poor selling Books...It would suck if people liked Hank more than Me.Hank has 8 eyes.He will stare at himself in the mirror with all of them, and get stuck-up,posing, signing Autographs,bits of dead bugs in his teeth, have his ownYouTube Videos, be on The Ellen Show... Or maybe Hank might get squished in the Microwave door.. It could happen...just a thought...
